Tuesday, 17 June 2014

Under pressure

Today is brought to you by Queen and Freddie Mercury, potentially in a white suit caring for the people on the edge of the night.

I like to sustain the pretence that I am in control of the important things in life, my choices, making my chances, driving things along.  So it figures that I am hating the process of house selling.  I am hating that having done everything I can to help myself (there has been a lot of emulsion in my life this last week) all I can do now is wait, and the dream I have for myself depends on whether someone wants to buy my house and whether someone else wants to buy the house I have an eye on. I'm not loving this very much.  It's starting to ooze out in my dreams and manifest itself in some typical anxiety symptoms.

In fact, I'm so aware of the anxiety and stress in my life that I've stopped using Strava for all my rides.  How on the earth riding my bike managed to change from something which relieves stress into something where I put pressure on myself to get faster I just don't know.  But Strava is now reserved for occasions when my sanity is intact enough that I get on with riding without caring.

Under pressure ...

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