Did you play pinball in your youth? I remember the electronic machines. Stuff happened, lights flashed, paddles flicked, bells sounded, springs compressed and exploded. Sometimes you'd set your ball free and wouldn't have to lift a finger as it ricocheted around the inside of the machine. You didn't even need to try to flick the flapper, as it were, it was just everywhere, all at once, out of control, bashing into everything. Sometimes when I look at facebook I realise I have friends like that, their lives resemble that shiny silver ball, no control as they are lurched from one thing to another, they speed up, slow down, get caught behind a barrier, start to fall, and are heartachingly flicked into a completely different place. It's not easy watching, not at all, and the powerlessness of not being able to open any kind of trap door or provide any kind of resting cushion for even a short while is uncomfortable. I don't like watching the unstoppability of it, never knowing if it's an up or a down they will hit next and not able to just grab their shoulders, look into their eyes and try to make the dizziness and disorientation go away.
I'm not sure I could live like that, but I do wonder if from the outside, people believe that I do?